Indians play (WhatsApp) status games!

Role of WhatsApp in Indian families.

Tale of two sisters

Two sisters, Saranya and Preeti, hail from Tamil Nadu and have wed into families with contrasting marriage situations. While the older sibling, Saranya, entered into a traditional arranged marriage, her younger sister Preeti chose to marry someone she had fallen in love with.

Despite both Saranya and her spouse being employed, Saranya has voluntarily shouldered the entire burden of household management alongside her mother-in-law. They take care of meal preparation, housekeeping, and overall home organization. Saranya embraced these responsibilities willingly, with minimal objections or opposition. She even considered herself fortunate to be married to her husband.

Prior to her marriage, her younger sister Preeti considered the traditional household roles to be normal, based on the examples set by her parents and brother in law in her life. However, her perspective shifts after she begins living with her spouse. Her husband's willingness to assist with household chores comes as a welcome surprise to Preeti, who discovers that their shared responsibilities significantly improve her quality of life.

Preeti grows increasingly concerned about her brother-in-law's lack of involvement in household tasks. She subtly expresses her disapproval by indirectly comparing him to her own husband, praising his helpfulness. Preeti also gently encourages her sister to be more assertive in requesting her husband's participation in domestic responsibilities.

Preeti, maintains a constant presence in Saranya's life through Instagram feeds and WhatsApp statuses. One morning, as Saranya hurriedly prepares her home before heading to work, she notices a WhatsApp status update from Preeti. The image displays Preeti relaxing in bed with a coffee, accompanied by a caption 'Lucky to have such a husband in my life'. The apparently harmless update triggers feelings of discontent in Saranya regarding her own situation, even though her actual circumstances remain unchanged.

Preeti's weekend outings with her husband now appear on Instagram feed, which sparks passive fights between Saranya and her husband. She urges her husband to take her out, dressed up to enjoy an evening, only for it to result in a series of WhatsApp status updates.

Before she even realizes it, Saranya falls prey to the status game, except this is just on WhatsApp.

Social media feeds and carefully curated online personas, it's easy to fall prey to what psychologists call the availability heuristic. This mental shortcut describes our tendency to overestimate the frequency of events that are easily recalled, often due to their vividness or recent exposure. These posts, while not necessarily representative of reality, can create a distorted perception of others' lives, making us feel inadequate or envious.

A fictional narrative inspired by various anecdotes shared on the Tamil discussion program 'Neeya Naana'.

Invisible Indian family game

In my family wedding gatherings are more than just kind gestures and meeting relatives. They are a way to showcase their social status. Attendees discuss business, money, children and their jobs, land, wealth, cars, and everything materialistic. It was either pride in having these things or gossip about someone not having them.

Now social media has given rise to new touch points beyond traditional wedding gatherings. These interactions now occur through non-verbal cues via WhatsApp statuses, photos shared in family groups, and video calls with relatives. For example, an uncle buying a new car hundreds of kilometers away can affect my dad's mental health.

The constant exposure to others' achievements and happy moments through social media can make these events seem more frequent and important than they truly are, leading to dissatisfaction with our own circumstances.

These digital signal also extend to how we percieve love and friendship

Love and friendship

I've had the same WhatsApp profile picture for the last 4 years. I never bothered to change it, as I didn't find the need. My wife, however, changes hers frequently. Sometimes she has a profile picture, and sometimes she doesn't.

I didn't find this particularly strange until one day I realized that her profile picture disappears every time we have an argument. It took me a few months to decipher this pattern, but I soon realized that if her profile picture vanishes, it means I've really upset her. It reflects her state of mind.

I have uncovered stories from Gen Z boys about how WhatsApp status updates send social signals in their circle. A boy posting a romantic poem or song on his status is not only dedicating it to his girlfriend but also signaling to his friends that he is capable of having a partner, which he takes pride in as an achievement.

Similarly, people who lift their phones to capture the title card of movies in theaters are posting status updates to signal that they have watched the movie on the first day, first show.

Conclusion

We started by achieving things in life to create memories. Later, it evolved into creating, remembering, and sharing those memories. Now, sharing has taken precedence.

I’m particularly fascinated by how AI can magnify these social signals within families and friendships— revealing new layers of human interaction. Observing the ways individuals shape their online identities, uphold cultural rituals, and navigate “status games” offers us a unique vantage point from which to interpret evolving social norms. Its only about time we would start manufacturing memories to win the game.

(somewhere in near future)

"Hey ChatGPT, can you write a script and execute my social media response to my sister's WhatsApp status?" the user asks, proceeding to select the 'deep jealous' button in the interface.